I challenged myself to write all of my adventures in mock-epic style poetry in 2022. Here in Indiana, we Hoosiers are about to get our first snowstorm of the year. The citizens of Indiana have several tried and true pre storm traditions. Like all good customs they go unquestioned. If it was good enough for our ancestors, it is good enough for us. We are very competitive when it comes to observing or folk ways. The fact that we’ve lived through every major snowstorm only confirms our belief in these practices. I always feel like the best part of a winter storm warning comes before the first snowflakes start to fly. So without any further ado, let’s get on with the poem I titled Before the Storm.
Before the Storm
Our wizardly weather soothsayers
Those mystic bad news purveyors,
Collected their Douppler radar, cards, and dice
Pronouncing a mandate that wasn’t nice.
A malevolent snowstorm traveling our way,
Forcing us to bundle up and step into the fray.
Foraging for food among empty shelves
Declaring out loud, “every man for himself.”
Hurry to the eggs, milk, and a loaf of bread
I would rather have ice cream instead.
Stand in line for over an hour
Hoping the milk doesn’t go sour.
Now that we have stocked the cabinets and refrigerator,
Don’t forget about gas for the snowblower and generator.
Open the door underneath the sink so the pipes won’t freeze,
Leave the water running one drip at a time, everyone, please.
Now that the preparations are made before the storm
Set back, relax. You are looking to be in good form.
Remain in comfort as the snowflakes start to fly
Don’t even think about giving the chariot a try
Before I go
There you have it. A quick of how we Hoosiers prepare for 15 inches of snow. If things go the way i think, we will only have light flurries. Here’s the deal. i firmly believe a plot exists between the grocery stores and the people who run the local news and Doppler radar. They send us scurrying to the store for supplies, organizations cancel events, and we sat at home glued to the television. It’s a win-win for them all. It makes a good conspiracy theory. We don’t complain about the bad forecasts too much. We wanted to eat our weight in French Toast anyway.
Who is Molly Shea?
Molly Shea is an accomplished fictional short story writer from Indiana who writes short stories and novels about a fictional town called Tecumseh. To read more of her short stories and adventures, click here.
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